The best of MJ

He has rarely been a topic of conversation in recent years, except to report the bizarre, the spectacle that was Michael Jackson, however I still remember the early years, and the good music. One of my faves, unfortunately, I can't imbed here, but I encourage you to have a watch by clicking through.

Hot beaches and beckoning water

Ah, but I love beach volleyball. It's admittedly not my best game. My best game is indoor women's 6's, if I were to be my own judge, but there is NOTHING like being outside, sweaty, in the sun, spiking down a ball, loofahing your skin with the granules getting into every nook and cranny, and, in Ottawa, if you are lucky, you will be playing by the water's edge.

This is not a right, you see, but a rare priviledge. Most of the volleyball leagues in town are man-made facilities in farm fields, maybe, or attached to bars. Not, in itself, a bad setup, right? But I like WATER. A real, honest to goodness beach, baby! And so I absolutley LOVE the fact that I play in a league, once a week, at Mooney's Bay beach in Ottawa. I know, I know, the level of play is not super competitive, but yanno, that's O.K. this year - perfect really.

So, it is with a sad, depressed heart, that I look to the water's edge in this heat, imagining the feel of the cool, slick, refreshing agua, and realize that really - it's kinda gross. Like, really dirty water. And I'm not all that picky. I was REALLY going to get into it. People think I am nuts, but I was. But when, after two sweaty of matches of ball ended, I approached the oasis before me, I truly saw the unappealing puddle that it was. So SAD. I couldn't do it. There was so much crap floating in it, and it was all murky, and, uh....I just decided I wasn't desperate enough. Maybe if they had outdoor showers VERY near by? Maybe.

But no, not this time.

So yeah...hot beaches, beckoning water, and facing bacterial infections just for the pleasure of indulging in a little tete-a-tete with nature's bounty.

Thank god we're heading to a friend's cottage soon!!!

A new move

I'm calling it the 'reality flip'. Too many damn reality shows on at the same time! Do I want to watch next top model or celebrity jungle crap or models and athletes kayaking through a resort lazy river? GOD! So many GREAT options!!!

Really. If you are going to do reality, can we PLEASE make it a little more compelling PULEEEEASE?

At least tomorrow night I have SYTYCD! Can't wait. Last week my favourite dance by far was one that also had a very personal resonance with me. It was a contemporary number that used the music I chose as the first dance between my husband and I at our wedding reception. The song, Falling Slowly, I first heard while watching the movie "Juno" (great movie), and it just spoke to me. The lyrics are incredible, and really seemed to capture, poetically, the journey my husband and I have taken together, and the optimism we both have for our future together. It was lovely.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qwtRuxUzNZ4

Watch and enjoy the beauty that is the best reality show amid a sea of wasted time.

I wanna be the Thirsty Traveler

What a job. I was just wondering aloud to my hubby just how often the host of this show gets laid. But seriously. How fabulous to be paid to travel around the world and ask the following question "What kind of alcohol d'ya got around here?" wherever you go...and with all that booze flowing, I'm just thinking that 'things' just happen. A blonde chick in Sweden, and sultry black-haired minx in Morocco, a buxom babe in Northern Ireland.

But I digress.

I've thought more about it, and really, I don't think I want to be him. No, thanks. He's forced, or asked politely, to drink and eat some pretty wacky stuff. And what if he doesn't FEEL like drinking? I'm fine just to crack a good bottle of wine if and when I want a sip or two or ten.

But none tonight, because I have a big day of beach volleyball tomorrow, and need to be ready to go. Can't wait!

And....before I sleep

A little amusement and some disturbing images to make you think...wow, there are some hideously stupid and short-sighted people out there.

Check out 'pubic armpit' in particular...

The mixed bag day

You know what I am referring to, don't you? The day that has some really great moments and some crapulous ones. The day that makes you feel like life is sometimes just a roller coaster and now that you are on it, you just have to hold on and if necessary, close your eyes (or ignore what you are seeing)...

So what was good? Lovely sunshine. Time on the deck with a glass of wine while I water the lawn and my now lovely garden. Getting some errands done, including freeing up credit on our Home Depot card in preparation for our very exciting kitchen reno. Getting an invitation out to good friends for a full-day social and sport day we have planned on Saturday that starts out on the beach volleyball courts and ends with drinks and food at a friend's home - very much looking forward to it. Great stuff, right?

Then there's the tough moments. Unhappy coworkers and a tough work environment. Taking a multitude of busses to get around town because I didn't have a car today, but I DID have an appointment. Which brings me to the really tough moments. Any time I now go to my doctor's, I face kids. Babies. Pregnant ladies. Lots of them. It's not a fun environment for a woman who has had two back-to-back failed pregnancies. And then the big moment, when my doctor calls my name out, and I look up, and SHE is pregnant. So pregnant that while I was suffering miscarriage, she was happily pregnant. Jeeeeeez. C'mon people! Ya gotta stop! Every day on Facebook - pictures of babies, pictures of growing bellies, status updates about baby heartbeats...and then....visiting babies at work in the hallways...it's a steady stream of reminders. All. The. Time. Over. And. Over.

Okay. I'm done. I am fine. I am sure that we will eventually have a family. I have lots of hope.

And sunshine, a garden and a new kitchen to enjoy and/or look forward to.

Shopping on a grand scale

It's a uniquely energizing and slightly anxiety-laden experience to spend big-time dollars on big ticket items. Like cars. Like houses. Like NEW KITCHENS! It's a unique feeling, and it is soooooo goooooood!

Husband and I had a hot date with our kitchen reno sales gal (woooohooo, a threesome for my hubby finally!) tonight to see the 3D design of the new kitchen, and go over to confirm all that we were visualizing. Not only did we love it, but it was much less than we expected to pay - and if the idea of a new kitchen feels good, spending less than you thought you would pay is simply orgasmic! Everything was so little, that we chose to upgrade further to thicker granite even. AND, it is all another 15% off right now...

Gosh... this is the best date night I have had in a long time!

Good start to the weekend - hope you have a great one.

and then there were two

I missed my man. He was away on a conference for four nights and five days, and although I used to LOVE living on my own and even today, generally love my freedoms in life, I think the timing wasn't the best, and overall I wanted him closer. So yeah...it is great to have him here again.

Even if he is upstairs at the computer and I am down here in front of the television.

Such intimacy!

Bloomin' ell!

Wha's that, then? It's my newly renovated garden, chip chop full of growing things. And it was my soul reviver in recent weeks. Nothing so cathartic as digging in the dirt and being responsible for helping plants and vegetables grow. Regret that I didn't take a 'before' shot, but the after are the real point, anyway, so here we are!



The grass still needs a LOT of work, but when doesn't it, really? While out there, I snapped a few shots of the early blooms, but there are many others on the way.




And more...




And so all that now remains is to see the veggies pop up. Cucumbers, carrots, spinach, beets, shallots, spring onion, three kinds of tomatoes, snap peas, snow peas, 8-10 various herbs, and pepper plants - loads of pepper plants! Sweet orange, green and red peppers, habanero peppers, hungarian wax peppers, serranos, poblanos...the list goes on.

So...salsa, gazpacho soup...fresh fresh fresh food is on its way - as long as we have some heat and lots of sunshine. So..BRING IT Mother Nature, just BRING. IT.

NOW is good.

Duelling Qs

You know that the summer has officially launched the first night that my husband and our next door neighbour get together to plan and execute an elaborate BBQ meal. It's not REALLY a competition, but they sure seem to try to step up their game constantly.

This Saturday was that night. Slow smoked pulled pork shoulder with a cumin spiced coleslaw, warm rosemary grilled potato and green bean salad for the main, and three different types of grilled dessert pizzas (with some cocktails and wine thrown in)... soooo gooood!

Great friends, great food and the great outdoors...fabulous.

Selling the farm

Well, no, not really. But we ARE selling old (but good) furniture to make way for the new. We have lots of great little pieces (and other, not so great items) that were for the most part either hand-me-downs or donations scattered here and there in our home, and the way I see it is that we are a two-income professional home with more than enough to afford some nicer damn furniture! So yeah...time to transform our home bit by bit, and I am excited.

And did I mention that the work week is almost over and I will be at the Nordik scandanavian spa at this time tomorrow night? That's what I am talkin' about, people!

And...I got more of my gardening done tonight, which also feels good. I can see the spinach, the beets, the beans, the snap and snow peas, the cucumbers, the shallots, the onions all coming up, and already have great tomato and pepper plants (Of any and all variations) on the go. And lettuce! I have planted a pot with arugula and mesculin mix that are coming up alongside all my herbs. Coolness. Will take pictures soon of the garden and post. Should have taken some before shots!!!

Very low

I am tired, sad and fat. I know I should give myself a break, with two miscarriages in 6 months, but its just so sad to not even fit into a size 16 all of a sudden. I have no clothes to wear (well, that's not true - I have pregnancy clothing). My thighs rub together when I walk and I think I will have trouble chafing when it finally (ever?) gets warm. I just can't believe how bad my self-esteem is right now.

How bad is it?

As I was walking downtown today, feeling my dress being pushed against my body by the wind, my internal dialogue told me, "Just pretend you are still pregnant, and walk tall pretending, because you still look that way. If you do that, then people won't look at you as fat, but as pregnant, even though it's not true." - lovely, eh?

I hate being in these dark places. It's not an environment I am used to. But I know it is pointless to ignore the impulse - gotta get through it to get out to the other side, right?

The weekend approaches, and that is good news. Being back at work has been hard.

My secret food addiction

I truly believe it is carcinogenic, but I LOVE a certain snack food, done up lovingly with melted butter (with just a touch of vinegar added to it), drizzled carefully over the popped goodness, and then generously and patiently coated with chemicals. Yup - I love me my popcorn with flavoured sprinkles. Made of nothing but bad stuff. And I put MUCH more on it than would generally be advisable.

So yeah...I may have had a big bowl of my secret food tonight. And I may have loved every stinkin' bad for me morsel of it.

So sue me.